Addicted
by Music's Insane Lover
Summary: AU! "His dark blond hair that I could run my fingers through, the blue eyes that always sparkled, and that smile that always made me feel giddy and gave me butterflies in my stomach. I guess I was addicted right then and there." Warnings are inside.


A/N 1: I had this idea when I was listening to one of Kelly Clarkson's songs called **Addicted**. Enjoy! :)

**Warning: **Slight mentions of abuse. :'( SLASH!

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"Castiel! Get your ass back here right now!"

I had to run. I _had _to. I was tired of being beaten down and pushed around by that _demon_. I just couldn't deal with it anymore.

It was years ago when we got together. He was so sweet, gentle, kind, and _so romantic_. Now, I don't know what happened. Maybe it was the booze, the drugs, or even the fact that his own damn father was this way toward him. I'm not so sure, but I have my suspicion it's all three of those things.

We were 17 when we met, and by God, was he the most beautiful thing I ever saw. His dark blond hair that I could run my fingers through, the blue eyes that always sparkled, and that smile that always made me feel giddy and gave me butterflies in my stomach. I guess I was addicted right then and there.

I remember our first date. It was a picnic near the lake. There were candles at each corner of the blanket and a rose right in the middle of it. I had never felt so nervous in my life, and that day, I was beyond nervous, but when I saw the candles and the flower, my heart skipped several beats. We talked about anything and everything. After the date, he drove me home and he walked me to the door. We smiled at each other and before I reached for the doorknob, he kissed my cheek and said goodnight. That night, I had barely gotten a few hours of sleep because I was thinking about the man who I became addicted to.

Our first kiss was breathtaking. We were watching the sunset in peace. I had my head on his shoulder and his arm around my waist and the next think I know, his lips were on mine. They were soft and pliant. They tasted like strawberries and chocolate, and I bet mine tasted like that too. The kiss felt like it lasted forever, but it was only a moment. When we pulled back, he smiled widely at me and I returned it. We put our foreheads together, still looking into each others eyes. I never knew I could grow to become more addicted to this man, but in that moment, I did.

The first time he told me he loved me was when we were making love for the first time. He was slow and gentle. The only sounds in the room were of our own gasps, moans, and groans. His sparkling blue eyes were on my own azure eyes the whole time, making our lovemaking even more intimate. As he came, he said those three words, and that's when I, too, came.

The first time he hit me was when he was drunk. I was putting the dishes away when I bumped into him and dropped the plate, shattering it. He grabbed my wrists, yelling at me, asking me what the hell was my problem. I told him that he was in the way and he slapped me, hard. I knew I had tears in my eyes, but I wouldn't let them fall. He shoved me down to the ground and told me to pick up the pieces, so I did, cutting my hand during the process. After I threw away the plate shards, I ran my hand under the water. I jumped when I felt a hand on my injured wrist and I knew it was him. I'm sorry he had said, causing the tears that were pooling in my eyes to fall. He had stitched up my hand and wrapped a bandage around the stitches. He kissed my foreheard before walking away. I just stared into space, worrying about the next time he might hit me.

The abuse continued after that. I don't know why I didn't just run away, but I guess it was my addiction to him. My hope of his old self coming back, but it didn't. It didn't come back.

I had to stop running because my lungs were screaming at me to stop, so I stopped by a tree, hiding from the streetlight. I stood there, catching my breath, and before I could start running again, I heard,

"There you are, Castiel."

I froze.

"Why were you running, darling?" he asked me.

My heart was pounding in my chest and it was getting harder to breathe. I turned my head toward him and said, "I'm sorry, Lucifer. I just needed some fresh air."

He smiled and walked up to me, grabbing my arm harshly, causing me to wince. "Let's go home, now," he murmured dangerously.

The words left my mouth before I could even think, "Yes, Lucifer."

I knew what was going to happen, I knew it. I just don't know why I refused to go home with him. Maybe it's because I'm simply just _addicted to him_.

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A/N 2: Wow... o.o Dx Poor Cas. *hugs the life outta Cas* :c In Criminal Justice, we are learning about Domestic Violence. So, combine Kelly's song **Addicted **and Domestic Violence and I got this. I love Mark Pellegrino so much, but his character... Bahhhhh! :c Hope you liked... noooooooo! HATED it! xDDDD Review if you want. Lemme know how I did. :)


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